Motherhood looks a little different to everyone. It may either look like a crazy nightmare, or it may look like pure perfection on the outside. One thing is for sure : Motherhood keeps you on your toes 24/7.

I was at the GP a few weeks back to take my little 8 month bubs in as he wasn’t feeling well. The weekend before that GP visit I had this disgusting stomach bug, and was back at work on Monday and in full mom mode.

Brooklyn got his meds, and then the doctor checked me out and we discussed how I was struggling with panic attacks again, and I was feeling that emotional dip and low. She gave me meds for that, and then went on with the check up and said “Cass, you need to be on antibiotics – you’ve got a major sinus infection and need to be booked off”. I laughed, and responded with: “I can’t be off, work is hectic at the moment and I can’t miss a day!” She looked a little shocked, and was like “but don’t you feel ill?” And I said : “I just feel tired, but I normally feel like this!” HA!

FYI – NO, I’m not a robot, I think motherhood just toughens you up, to the point where you forget to listen to your body – and you just keep going. Because everyone else needs you, right?

MOTHERHOOD REALITY CHECK

I can’t press pause in this season, I can’t go on a vacation just “me,myself and I”. I’ve got little people depending on me, I have a husband who has a demanding time consuming job, and I’m currently teaching a couple hundred kids Drama. I can’t press pause, even if I wanted to.

But what I can do is: acknowledge when I feel weak, defeated, overwhelmed, and put my hands up and say “I need help!”.

As moms we struggle to admit that we too are human, and we too need help! If we don’t acknowledge those honest moments, we live in denial, and try to act like a hero, who has got it all together – when in actual fact we don’t.

If we never put our hands up and ask for help, no one will ever know – and won’t know how to lean in and support us – which will leave us feeling even more alone and overwhelmed…

Back to the GP story :

Whilst sitting in the doctors office, I was cheering Brooklyn up whilst she was writing down our scripts. The DR looked at me and said “You’re such an amazing mom!”

I smiled, I wasn’t feeling like an amazing mom! I felt like I was failing, like I couldn’t juggle it all – like I wanted to give up and just escape.

I told her that I try my best, but I feel like I’m emotionally losing it behind the scenes, like I’m not coping. We spoke about my anxiety levels, as I was trying to be a hero by NOT taking my anxiety meds, and the stress and stretch of this new season of momming two little people and working full time had been catching up to me.

After re-looking at my meds, and sorting that out – I realized that in this season right now of; awesome, crazy, yet beautiful chaos – that I need to do what I can to help support my emotional and mental well being, or otherwise I will suffer behind the scenes.

MOTHERHOOD INTERVENTION

You see sometimes (as we know) from the outside people may perceive that you’ve got it all together. I mean no one really walks around “crying hysterically oversharing their issues”.

NO, we put on a brave smile, keep going on the outside – wearing that mask – suffering in silence.

AGAIN, how will people (our family, friends) know if we don’t let them in, open up and ask for help?

I have a very close circle of friends that I trust with the things that I keep hidden from the world. They see the tears, they hear the brokenness, then they offer: encouragement, love, support and most of all have my back in prayer! Without it I would go insane, I can guarantee that! Ha!

Then my other biggest blessing is my mom – she understands anxiety and depression as she fights it daily, and offers me the most support and encouragement. She helps with the boys, she reminds me that “it’s okay to feel overwhelmed but to not stay there, she reminds me that motherhood is a circus show”.. Her overcoming fighting spirit encourages me to take one day at a time, to breathe, and just be… PS : LOVE you mama!

SO, my fellow mom friends, first time moms, moms to be, one day mama’s:

Motherhood may look cute, perfect and amazing on the outside like those cute ‘Pinterest mom & kid’ pictures you adore and gush over (and most days it is) but BEHIND THE SCENES – it’s tough.

You’re looking after little people, dealing with their : not so perfect sleeping patterns, their sick moments, their tantrums and fiery personalities, to having to try clean up your ‘Jumanji’ looking house, basically trying to keep them alive and stay semi sane!

You may feel like you’re failing,

AND THAT IS OKAY, IT’S NORMAL…

You may feel like you’re losing your mind

AND THAT IS OKAY, IT’S NORMAL…

You may feel overwhelmed and defeated,

AND THAT IS OKAY, IT’S NORMAL…

You may need to put your hand up and ask for help,

AND THAT IS OKAY, IT’S NORMAL…

YOU’RE NOT ALONE MOM FRIEND, AND YOU DON’T HAVE TO SUFFER IN SILENCE ALONE!

FIND YOUR TRIBE & SUPPORT ONE ANOTHER <3

1 Comment

  1. Mari-Louise Candiotes March 11, 2019 at 3:46 pm

    I love it when you write. Always the most amazing posts and so honest. Thanks for this friend.

    Reply

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